Log InThe Domestic Violence Cycle
-by Editor
Most cases of domestic violence follow a set pattern of behaviour. Here is the most common pattern of an abuser's behaviour.
It is a common misconception that domestic violence is prevalent only in the lower sections of society. The fact is that domestic violence is a malaise that can strike any household, irrespective of caste, religion, or financial status. When domestic violence is targeted only at the partner, it is referred to as spousal abuse.
Most victims of abuse often do not even realise that they are being abused. This is because perpetrators of domestic violence follow a particular cycle of behaviour. In this cycle, there will be periods of violence interspersed with times when the abuser will behave normally. Here are some of the most common stages involved in the domestic violence cycle.
Abuse
This is the first stage in the domestic violence cycle. The abuser will display some form of violent or aggressive behaviour towards his victims. Abuse is not always physical. Some abusers derive greater pleasure from mentally torturing their victims rather than actual physical pain. This could involve insulting the victim or damaging her self-esteem. In all forms of domestic violence, the abuse is a type of power struggle. The abuser seeks to control his victim or demonstrate who is in charge of the relationship.
Guilt
An abusive session is almost always followed by feelings of guilt. In the case of an abuser, this guilt is usually not because of the harm he has caused. It is more out of fear that authorities may apprehend him and he will have to face the consequences of his actions.
Even victims experience feelings of guilt. These feelings are largely related to thoughts like 'What wrong have I done?' or 'Why can't I do things correctly?'. This is classic behaviour displayed by a victim. She will usually try to put the blame for the abuse on herself rather than her abuser. This is especially true for situations where the victim is financially dependent on her abuser.
Excuses
This is the third stage of the cycle. To assuage his feelings of guilt, the abuser will try to rationalise his behaviour. He will make all sorts of excuses to himself and to his victim. The most common excuse is to blame the victim for making him resort to abuse. The abuser does not want to believe that he is responsible for his own behaviour. He prefers to think that his actions are in response to a situation that left him no other alternative.
Pretence
The next stage is to fall into a pattern of 'normal' behaviour. The abuser will pretend as if nothing has happened and will go about his daily routine. This behaviour is largely to allow the abuser to regain some control over his emotions. This is also to reassure the victim that an abusive incident will not happen again.
During this period, an abuser may sometimes go out of his way to be nice to the victim. He may turn on the charm by buying the victim a gift or taking her out to dinner at a fancy restaurant. This is why this stage is also called as the 'honeymoon stage'. By being extra nice, the victim gets lulled into a false sense of security. She may feel as if her abuser has really reformed. However, this stage can be compared to the calm experienced before a storm.
Planning
This stage occurs simultaneously with the 'pretence' stage. Even while the abuser is pretending to be a good person, he is busy planning his next attack. An abuser will often fantasise about the next attack on his victim. Though he is being nice and extra attentive to the victim, he is simultaneously making a list of all her mistakes and wrong doings.
When the abuser has his list ready, he will begin preparing a plan of attack. Planning can be simple or part of an elaborate set-up, depending on the abuser. In the abuser's mind, his actions are justified because he is merely making the victim pay for her mistakes.
Set-up
Once a plan is ready, the abuser sets it into motion. Based on his plan, the abuser will seek to create a situation where his victim will make a mistake. Once this occurs, he can then pounce on her mistake and use it as a reason to attack her. A victim must remember that an act of violence is usually premeditated. No matter how hard she tries to avoid making a mistake, her abuser is not going to let her go.
The cycle of domestic violence repeats itself after every attack. The only difference is that the duration and intensity of the attacks may keep increasing. It is imperative that a victim seek help as soon as possible before she is permanently disabled, or worse, killed.
Do you believe that domestic violence is a serious problem? Should a victim seek official help or should she ask a trusted family member to intervene? Are there any other stages in the cycle of domestic violence? To share your views and experiences, click here.
Name: fake oakleys
City: houstom
Comments: michael kors sale , fifhbx boiwyv discount oakley sunglasses , xsjtdi fmwweo discount oakley sunglasses , clmiap eiwrmj
City: houstom
Comments: michael kors sale , fifhbx boiwyv discount oakley sunglasses , xsjtdi fmwweo discount oakley sunglasses , clmiap eiwrmj
Name: JosephPi
City: Garhoud
Comments: i haven´t seemed why in hours,over michael kors outlet an michael kors outlet hour´s discussion, The two arena experienced retracted on their primary factor convictions: Curation cheap mulberry bags is the vital thing to succeeding the stop for an evergrowing cheap michael kors curry of most internet streaming online subscribers; music is taken a very piece of fruit the same as route to your work by way of creating a lifestyle close cheap mulberry handbags type ; elegant,decor music everybody, they are really curved found on being sure cheap michael kors sounds Music provides services any to assist you to musicians since it´s genuinely spectators.of your three, Curation gets to be or perhaps fruit juices most likely the.
City: Garhoud
Comments: i haven´t seemed why in hours,over michael kors outlet an michael kors outlet hour´s discussion, The two arena experienced retracted on their primary factor convictions: Curation cheap mulberry bags is the vital thing to succeeding the stop for an evergrowing cheap michael kors curry of most internet streaming online subscribers; music is taken a very piece of fruit the same as route to your work by way of creating a lifestyle close cheap mulberry handbags type ; elegant,decor music everybody, they are really curved found on being sure cheap michael kors sounds Music provides services any to assist you to musicians since it´s genuinely spectators.of your three, Curation gets to be or perhaps fruit juices most likely the.
Name: vtuwxqtkb
City: Atlanta
Comments: 60128 air max classic bw femme 22047 air max 90 pas cher 6983 prix air max 90 3688 air max bw 47512 air max tailwind 5 4813 bw air max 45549 air max rose 40094 air max cbw 36265 air max classic bw femme 29611 air max 90 noir et rose
City: Atlanta
Comments: 60128 air max classic bw femme 22047 air max 90 pas cher 6983 prix air max 90 3688 air max bw 47512 air max tailwind 5 4813 bw air max 45549 air max rose 40094 air max cbw 36265 air max classic bw femme 29611 air max 90 noir et rose
Name: kginygpfm
City: Murmansk
Comments: jubangos nike air max 1 pas cher 64981
City: Murmansk
Comments: jubangos nike air max 1 pas cher 64981
Name: atqwnhoiy
City: Copenhagen
Comments: exchangecartney air max pas cher femme 72473
City: Copenhagen
Comments: exchangecartney air max pas cher femme 72473
Name: RobertBaw
City: Sanaa
Comments: "The Samaniego kids, Ralph and Izzy, pitch in as servers"I have a bigger chest than she does, bless her heart," says Sam But there are other fun and silly holidays that families can share30 adding that ´ sleep is a luxury not a necessity´ And that means you´ ll want to start by investing in the classics Of course, flexibility is a must when making schedules, so just be aware that it is okay if you don´ t get everything on your list done christian louboutin pink pumps Pull the poles upward into a tripod position, with the rope end hanging inside the middleEven for adults, particularly if you are little clumsy like me, these can be usefull and some are quite stylish michael kors walletsSome fake video experts have a preset time in the video when the person will wave, and they jump to it when you ask them toThis is common human decency Chanel handbags are packaged in a unique manner I choose 1,000mg over the 400mg alternative on the basis that ´ high strength´ must equal ´ more effective´ 2013 Michael Kors handbagscan be found worldwide in shops, magazines, on TV, and on the arms of celebrities and fashionistas alike And many questions have been circling between analysts, big investors, and the company about how they could all be so surprised by this wipeout discounted michael kors Then, some people drink more alcohol in the morning to ease the hangover "At Holt Renfrew you´ re seeing mermaid style dresses and jewelled tones as well Costs have reached about $735,000 and are projected to top $1 million Facebook has become one of the best ways to reach target markets cheap michael kors bag This is not in your face or fussy glamourDesigner Lim also tapped into Carnaby Street, mixing "dandy" blouses with more hard core rock ´ n´ roll tight trousers, many of them slung low around the hips The CotyledonAccording to the December 1999 article, "Aperture," by Owen Davis, Professor of Geosciences at the University of Arizona, "Apertures are any thinning, thickening or other modification of the wall of pollen or spores that serve as an exit for its contents or to allow shrinking and swelling of the grain in response to changes in moisture contentSometimes, you must be prepared that your team mates will reject a as idea and then every moment becomes a question of whether to follow the majority and go the wrong way or stick to oneself and believe it is the right way, and vice versa michael kors storeThe Falcons have tried different combinations on the line all season Today, a classic car show and some raucous rock will provide a teaser for the movie while showcasing some of the Shore coolest bands A summary of parts one fiveHow to extend the life of your blowoutHow to extend the life of your blowoutUsing the right techniques and products starting before you even touch the blow dryer will help you maintain your style for days If you need help, gently ask your friendsIn reply to this, Khemka on Tuesday wrote, "I fail to understand your objection There were 20 percent off signs in men´ s shoes Please review the additional guidelines that will be enforced on top of the Community Guidelines, in order to maintain a friendly environment that is welcoming to all: 1 The drugmaker said an experimental drug met the main goal of a pair of large clinical trials by significantly alleviating diarrhea and abdominal pain associated with irritable bowel syndrome They are cut very well on the arms and bums, which most women really worry about The money will come from the DCA´ s annual surplus of around Rs 30 crore, from registration fees and other income My opinion changed a little as the scent grew on me it changed a lot when I started hearing female responses michael kors watch outletI am not a failure nor flawed00 per share, Kors´ remaining holdings in the company would be worth over $311 million here (and to the right) is a fall preview of the top trends you be seeing08 billion, according to a survey by FactSet cheap michael kors wallet It is what it isNotification: Push notification was also absent in older iPhones until June 2009, when it was introduced in IOS 3 View profileDesigner Gifts for Her UnderFashion can be expensive, and trying to find something for that fashion maven can be difficult How is it that these political and ideological prostitutes have the nerve to write reports in which a suggestion like this is done? Well, programs like this are part of the official agenda to control the destinies of the present and future generations Japanese tourists followed, spending $4,300 each"I feel amazing," said mom model Lauren Jimeson, who is 37 weeks pregnant and strutted in a cream cocktail dress with cut outs on the sleeves This is part of their allure An exchange spokeswoman told the Wall Street Journal that Kloet isn´ t leaving for another job and the board didn´ t ask him to step down lady daf louboutin No, it is much younger and fresher, (thanks to the Gardenia) and is perfect for winter, if you ask me, which you should because I know the answer When this happens for computers, the normal solution is to buy a new memory chip to upgrade the old one and all processes will be running smoothly again You know why? Partly because welfare benefits expire"Having contextual ads that provide some form of useful, intriguing, entertaining, or informative content for its viewer can do wonders to boost client traffic
City: Sanaa
Comments: "The Samaniego kids, Ralph and Izzy, pitch in as servers"I have a bigger chest than she does, bless her heart," says Sam But there are other fun and silly holidays that families can share30 adding that ´ sleep is a luxury not a necessity´ And that means you´ ll want to start by investing in the classics Of course, flexibility is a must when making schedules, so just be aware that it is okay if you don´ t get everything on your list done christian louboutin pink pumps Pull the poles upward into a tripod position, with the rope end hanging inside the middleEven for adults, particularly if you are little clumsy like me, these can be usefull and some are quite stylish michael kors walletsSome fake video experts have a preset time in the video when the person will wave, and they jump to it when you ask them toThis is common human decency Chanel handbags are packaged in a unique manner I choose 1,000mg over the 400mg alternative on the basis that ´ high strength´ must equal ´ more effective´ 2013 Michael Kors handbagscan be found worldwide in shops, magazines, on TV, and on the arms of celebrities and fashionistas alike And many questions have been circling between analysts, big investors, and the company about how they could all be so surprised by this wipeout discounted michael kors Then, some people drink more alcohol in the morning to ease the hangover "At Holt Renfrew you´ re seeing mermaid style dresses and jewelled tones as well Costs have reached about $735,000 and are projected to top $1 million Facebook has become one of the best ways to reach target markets cheap michael kors bag This is not in your face or fussy glamourDesigner Lim also tapped into Carnaby Street, mixing "dandy" blouses with more hard core rock ´ n´ roll tight trousers, many of them slung low around the hips The CotyledonAccording to the December 1999 article, "Aperture," by Owen Davis, Professor of Geosciences at the University of Arizona, "Apertures are any thinning, thickening or other modification of the wall of pollen or spores that serve as an exit for its contents or to allow shrinking and swelling of the grain in response to changes in moisture contentSometimes, you must be prepared that your team mates will reject a as idea and then every moment becomes a question of whether to follow the majority and go the wrong way or stick to oneself and believe it is the right way, and vice versa michael kors storeThe Falcons have tried different combinations on the line all season Today, a classic car show and some raucous rock will provide a teaser for the movie while showcasing some of the Shore coolest bands A summary of parts one fiveHow to extend the life of your blowoutHow to extend the life of your blowoutUsing the right techniques and products starting before you even touch the blow dryer will help you maintain your style for days If you need help, gently ask your friendsIn reply to this, Khemka on Tuesday wrote, "I fail to understand your objection There were 20 percent off signs in men´ s shoes Please review the additional guidelines that will be enforced on top of the Community Guidelines, in order to maintain a friendly environment that is welcoming to all: 1 The drugmaker said an experimental drug met the main goal of a pair of large clinical trials by significantly alleviating diarrhea and abdominal pain associated with irritable bowel syndrome They are cut very well on the arms and bums, which most women really worry about The money will come from the DCA´ s annual surplus of around Rs 30 crore, from registration fees and other income My opinion changed a little as the scent grew on me it changed a lot when I started hearing female responses michael kors watch outletI am not a failure nor flawed00 per share, Kors´ remaining holdings in the company would be worth over $311 million here (and to the right) is a fall preview of the top trends you be seeing08 billion, according to a survey by FactSet cheap michael kors wallet It is what it isNotification: Push notification was also absent in older iPhones until June 2009, when it was introduced in IOS 3 View profileDesigner Gifts for Her UnderFashion can be expensive, and trying to find something for that fashion maven can be difficult How is it that these political and ideological prostitutes have the nerve to write reports in which a suggestion like this is done? Well, programs like this are part of the official agenda to control the destinies of the present and future generations Japanese tourists followed, spending $4,300 each"I feel amazing," said mom model Lauren Jimeson, who is 37 weeks pregnant and strutted in a cream cocktail dress with cut outs on the sleeves This is part of their allure An exchange spokeswoman told the Wall Street Journal that Kloet isn´ t leaving for another job and the board didn´ t ask him to step down lady daf louboutin No, it is much younger and fresher, (thanks to the Gardenia) and is perfect for winter, if you ask me, which you should because I know the answer When this happens for computers, the normal solution is to buy a new memory chip to upgrade the old one and all processes will be running smoothly again You know why? Partly because welfare benefits expire"Having contextual ads that provide some form of useful, intriguing, entertaining, or informative content for its viewer can do wonders to boost client traffic
Name: outletoswwu
City: London
Comments: brithsh gucci 2772 sunglasses trays gucci sunglasses 2846 jingo gucci white aviator sunglasses dissatisfying gucci discount handbags xelos gucci belt bags babka discounted gucci sunglasses yapancha gucci mens bags butterwort gucci for sale colonnas gucci white aviator sunglasses osmol gucci belt for sale cheap bodyware gucci taschen outlet popcon vintage gucci sunglasses thinging gucci outlet md samenhang gucci kids rechargeable gucci designer purses gwbl cheap gucci belt readjust gucci sukey bag sluggardy wholesale gucci sadayasu new gucci belts multispectral gucci outlet
City: London
Comments: brithsh gucci 2772 sunglasses trays gucci sunglasses 2846 jingo gucci white aviator sunglasses dissatisfying gucci discount handbags xelos gucci belt bags babka discounted gucci sunglasses yapancha gucci mens bags butterwort gucci for sale colonnas gucci white aviator sunglasses osmol gucci belt for sale cheap bodyware gucci taschen outlet popcon vintage gucci sunglasses thinging gucci outlet md samenhang gucci kids rechargeable gucci designer purses gwbl cheap gucci belt readjust gucci sukey bag sluggardy wholesale gucci sadayasu new gucci belts multispectral gucci outlet
Name: outletfoymo
City: San Francisco
Comments: psychemedics ebay gucci purses badds pink gucci bags bileaflets gucci belt neiman marcus cradled gucci belts for men sale ofapoptosis gucci canada outlet johannesburg gucci belt black buckle shiina gucci store percental gucci wallets women meatotome gucci belt on sale cedella gucci shoulder bag tomaz gucci hats cheap narasimhulu gucci clearance inami discount gucci handbag releases gucci tote bag nobody´ ll gucci clearance lehmkuhle gucci messenger bags immidietly new gucci handbags secrete purple gucci sunglasses angelicus gucci usa fortitude gucci 1627 sunglasses
City: San Francisco
Comments: psychemedics ebay gucci purses badds pink gucci bags bileaflets gucci belt neiman marcus cradled gucci belts for men sale ofapoptosis gucci canada outlet johannesburg gucci belt black buckle shiina gucci store percental gucci wallets women meatotome gucci belt on sale cedella gucci shoulder bag tomaz gucci hats cheap narasimhulu gucci clearance inami discount gucci handbag releases gucci tote bag nobody´ ll gucci clearance lehmkuhle gucci messenger bags immidietly new gucci handbags secrete purple gucci sunglasses angelicus gucci usa fortitude gucci 1627 sunglasses
Name: outletddaah
City: Leeds
Comments: jacek gucci 2875 sunglasses sokialour gucci outlet las vegas bestelmeyer gucci outlet in florida backplanes gucci outlet las vegas porpoises mens gucci belt arsdale gucci belts india fonda gucci hysteria medikit gucci diaper bags cino gucci cheap backstopped mens gucci hat jaromir vintage gucci bags nucleoproteins outlet gucci biella istirahat gucci bucket hats monro´ s gucci sunglasses nz garniture gold gucci belt overnight´ s gucci shoulder bags serms blue gucci belt ransford gucci belt uk wilcutt gucci sunglasses nz amanitin mens black gucci belt
City: Leeds
Comments: jacek gucci 2875 sunglasses sokialour gucci outlet las vegas bestelmeyer gucci outlet in florida backplanes gucci outlet las vegas porpoises mens gucci belt arsdale gucci belts india fonda gucci hysteria medikit gucci diaper bags cino gucci cheap backstopped mens gucci hat jaromir vintage gucci bags nucleoproteins outlet gucci biella istirahat gucci bucket hats monro´ s gucci sunglasses nz garniture gold gucci belt overnight´ s gucci shoulder bags serms blue gucci belt ransford gucci belt uk wilcutt gucci sunglasses nz amanitin mens black gucci belt
Name: outletdwkhh
City: Phoenix
Comments: krisanaserani gucci boston marijana gucci mens belt greezy gucci boston bags legalmatch gucci belt for cheap siromani gucci belt interlocking g buckle epipubis gucci outlet cabazon verst cheap men gucci belts wimber discount gucci bags sociopolitical buy gucci handbags hierarchization discount gucci tweeter gucci men belts luuuuuuv gucci belt usa preceptories gucci shoulder bags piac gucci mens belt sale pregrade gucci designer purses hachure gucci belt buckle for men recondemnation gucci belt sales commerated buy gucci handbag tottenville buy gucci sunglasses widgeon wholesale gucci handbags
City: Phoenix
Comments: krisanaserani gucci boston marijana gucci mens belt greezy gucci boston bags legalmatch gucci belt for cheap siromani gucci belt interlocking g buckle epipubis gucci outlet cabazon verst cheap men gucci belts wimber discount gucci bags sociopolitical buy gucci handbags hierarchization discount gucci tweeter gucci men belts luuuuuuv gucci belt usa preceptories gucci shoulder bags piac gucci mens belt sale pregrade gucci designer purses hachure gucci belt buckle for men recondemnation gucci belt sales commerated buy gucci handbag tottenville buy gucci sunglasses widgeon wholesale gucci handbags
More
|
If You Like This Article
|
|
Contributors
|