How important is it to be friends with other mothers? Does one really need to make the effort?

Radhika, mother of two girls, reminisces, 'When I was young, I don't remember my mother hanging out with my friend's mothers, and it was fine that way. I don't think I missed anything, so I don't see why I should make an effort to be friends with other mothers.'

Information

Do you have a doctor for your child? Are you happy with him? Or do you feel you cannot ask everything you want, as he is rushed and busy? Whatever you feel, if you are friends with other mothers, you can discuss this situation with them. They may have a great doctor that you can try out and be glad you did. There are many such great suggestions and recommendations that can be passed on from other mothers.

Holidays

Holidays are a lot more fun. If you are good friends with another couple or two, and they have children the same age as your child, trips out of town are guaranteed to be a blast as not just you but your children will also have a great time. On the other hand if you go for holidays with friends who don't have children, your child may get bored as he doesn't have company.

Outings

Similarly, you can very easily make plans for dinners out or at each other's place. If you want to leave your children at someone's place as you will return late at night, sure you may be able to leave them with your sister or with their grandmother, but every now and again for a change you can leave them with a friend who has children your age. This could be a reciprocal arrangement. You can have fun at your party, and your kids will have fun with their friends.

Reciprocation

Making friends with other mothers however is not always easy. You do need to make an effort, and always reciprocate invitations. If your friends invite your children over, then make it a point to invite them over.

Get-togethers

Plan for the initial get-togethers to be relatively short. You may be just getting to know the mother, and your child may be just getting to know her children. In any case, if your child gets tired and wants to go back, don't force him to keep playing against his wishes. He may get cranky, and the situation could turn sour.

Kitties

If you have the time or can spare a few hours from work, join a kitty. It may not seem like something you would like to do, but a kitty is a good way to meet other women and mothers. A kitty provides an opportunity for you to get together and discuss your children. You will have plenty to talk about, and meeting other mothers opens up new avenues for your children to make friends.

Comparisons

One thing however that many ‘mother' friends incessantly do is compare their children. Then begins the pressure of trying to outdo other mothers by proving your child is better or more talented than theirs. While your child may be good at something, your friend's child may be good at something else. Comparing doesn't help you or your child, so discourage it as far as possible.