 |
Building
Self-confidence
What it means
to be confident
Rahul Sheth, father of 5-year-old
Ankush : "My son is a real chatterbox. He's always up to something - singing,
dancing, acting…you'd think he's a born performer. But this is only at
home. In school, they say he is a mouse and he keeps quiet in front of
guests."
In all likelihood, Ankush's problem
is a lack of confidence. When a person is confident, it means that he has
faith in his own abilities and competence; he trusts his own judgement
and is not worried about handling new situations; and he is aware of the
fact that others value his abilities. This, in turn, makes him more open
and outgoing, straightforward, trusting, trustworthy and reliable and determined
and able to stick at things.
Tips for building
confidence in your child
The Dos
-
A little thing like establishing routine
and making the home environment as predictable as possible goes a long
way towards making your child feel secure.
-
Gradually expose them to social situations.
First, you could just play with them when others are around. Then encourage
them to play with family, friends and other children his age. You could
ask your child to recite the nursery rhyme he learnt in school that day
or tell a story. He's bound to get a lot of encouragement and appreciation
both from you and your friends. This will develop his social skills and
he will not shy away from public situations.
-
Remember to keep activities like watching
television and playing computer games down to a minimum, as these activities
do not foster the development of social behaviour like conversation, sharing
and compromise.
-
Make a list of the things your child
is good at and of the things he likes to do. Ask your child to make a list
too. Compare both the lists and if your child has left out something you
have included, let him know that that's something else he's good at. If
you don't have something on your child's list, may be you haven't being
paying enough attention.
-
If you find this tedious or difficult
to do, you could encourage your child to participate in extra-curricular
activities like team sports, music lessons or art lessons. It's possible
that he may find that he's got a talent for something. In addition, he
will meet new people and learn a new skill.
-
Ask your child to help you. This will
make him feel important and competent. For instance, if he is strong, you
can ask him to help you carry groceries from the car.
-
If he is working on something new, give
him plenty of support and make him feel that you're confident that he will
succeed.
-
Last, but not least, give him plenty
of encouragement.
The Don'ts
-
Do not question his competence and undermine
his ability to do things for himself. If you're worried, keep an eye on
him, but try not to interfere.
-
Do not compare him to other children
and find him wanting.
-
Confidence in your child's ability and
competence does not necessarily mean that you should leave him to his own
devices.
To add your views on
this article or read others comments Click Here
Back to Previous Page
More on Raising Children Index
Email this Article to a Friend
|
